Hi there. My name is Alva Leigh. I was born & raised on the Mississippi Gulf Coast (Gulfport!). In 2005 I moved to Nashville to go to college at Belmont. I cut my teeth in the Nashville scene til I learned that no amount of gin & tonics with weird industry dudes at the Mercy Lounge would equal a music career. So I married my high school crush and moved to London.

He was there getting a PhD, and I was working odd jobs and trying to be a better songwriter. I met a very nice Welshman named Al Lewis on a co-write, and we ended up forming a duo called Lewis & Leigh. We released a few EPs and an album. We toured around Europe & the UK, played festivals and picked up an award or two. It was pretty great.

When I was 29, I decided I wanted a baby even though I knew it would blow up everything I was working on. But! I did it anyway. Really glad I did. That girl is 7.5 now and such a delight. After life with the band quieted down, I thought I would transition into this new role of motherhood with ease, but in reality, it has been pretty messy.

Don’t get me wrong: I love my children. I love being their mom. I love making music. These things can all fit together. But when I moved back to America in 2020, it felt like the only way to be a “good mother” was to be just a mother.

I've gathered in one hand all I say I know / Loosely in the other all I'm ready to let go - “Me Before the You”

I’ve chosen to accept this season for what it is: many things at once. Ever since I entered this motherhood portal I have felt caught between knowing myself and losing myself. I’m out here knockin’ around with my flashlight in a wilderness full of luck and loneliness, pain and magic, grief and joy, hope and loss.

I’ve written a collection of songs over the last 8 years from this wilderness place which you will start hearing soon. This newsletter will be my digital nest of what inspired these songs and what’s inspiring me now. If that sounds interesting to you, please pull up a chair.

Join the troop

I’d like to think of all the caretakers as one big troop of wilderness scouts, earning badges we never thought we would earn. Some badges I never thought I would earn:

🛶 holding someone’s vomit in my bare hands in a moving taxi

🛶 being so tired that I get into the shower with my socks on

🛶 memorizing the Wild Kratts rap

🛶 seeing your parents differently after becoming one

🛶 charting new courses of empathy for myself and for others

🛶 carving out space to take care of myself while care taking

Most of what I offer here will be free. Every new post is sent directly to your email inbox. For a spam-free, ad-free reading experience, I recommend downloading the Substack app. But I am creating a paid subscriber-only space - a troop if you will - for those of you who might like to support this work, receive special posts, and join in a community. We can chat about how you’re surviving in whatever wilderness you find yourself.